My Life

What a crazy season of life this is! In my heart and mind I feel like I belong with the teenagers doing teenage things - staying up late, parties, holding down a full time job, being crazy and carefree. I'm not a teenager anymore though. I've got to somehow remember that. I'm a Mommy to two energized babies and a wife. If I'm up later than 11:00 I'm sunk the next day. Parties mean paying for a babysitter and crazy and carefree can equal irresponsible when two precious lives are now in your charge. As for a full time job, well I have a 24/7 job. If not careful, I can find myself longing for the "good ol days" of freedom and a crazy spirit. I realized that right now, right here may be the most precious time in my life; when two new lives are mine to take care of, nurture, and train. Embracing "mommyhood" took me a while. I have always been grateful for my girls, but as far as really embracing and owning the responsibility it didn't come naturally. I like sleeping in, dates, pretty clothes, time to myself, a solid paycheck, and the ability to leave the house whenever I choose. But I'll tell you what - Nothing, nothing beats waking up at 6:00am to two different sounds on two different monitors. One is Gwendolyn saying good morning to each of her animals and the other is Summer cooing and making smacking sounds with her little baby lips. My family = My life.

It Really Does Fly

Time flies. Everyone says so, but it really does. One morning you're eating breakfast with your six siblings and the next you're cooking breakfast for your 1-year-old daughter. I used to wonder if I would ever grow up, what it would be like to be a teenager, to be a college student. Crazy how all that is behind me now. Over the past six years I feel like my life has been in super-charge mode. Let me walk you through the highlights of the past six years:

Age 20: Met a boy who was somewhat a bad boy and fell madly in love with him after our first date. 

Age 21: Graduated from college and continued dating that boy. On a clear, romantic night in early January I said "Yes" to a certain question and a beautiful diamond ring.

Age 22: Nine months later found myself saying "I do" to that same boy on a beautiful day in September.

Age 23: Blissfully uneventful as I started my new life as a married woman. We vacationed. We spent to much money. We had to much fun.

Age 24: A certain pregnancy test rocked my world in July and then I met the most wonderful girl in the world on March 1st.

Age 25: Left alone for five-months with a newborn after my husband accepted his dream job after three years of searching. We found out after his graduation that our lives were changing again with another baby girl on the way.

Age 26: In just a few days or weeks I will be a mother again and this year will be full of diapers, spit-up, butterfly kisses, sleepless nights, cuddles, and more love in my life than I ever imagined. 

Here's to growing up!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpFW4Yhy08k

Police Wife's Life

At the end of a long day I'm snuggled up with Luke in bed. I'm going on and on about hopes and dreams and I assume he is listening with all his attention. I tell him how much I love him and how proud of him I am and ask him to play with my hair. Ahhh, wedded bliss. This is good. I'm about to turn over for another kiss when suddenly my arm is yanked out from under me and twisted up behind my back. Before I could even gasp my other arm is jerked above my head and my wrists are being bent backwards. Next go my fingers. I am completely helpless. I can't move a muscle without it hurting.

"LUKE! What the HECK are you doing?"

"Huh? Oh, sorry Kimi. I'm practicing my arm bars. I can't get rusty. See if I do this you can't move and if I do it like this....."

Sigh, so much for a romantic middle-of-the-night makeout session. I just shake my head at him, but secretly I love it.

Gwendolyn Turns One!

Friday we celebrated Gwen's first birthday. It was a sweet time of just her, Luke and I and then later family and friends. As soon as we heard her waking up we went into her room and sang Happy Birthday. She had such a confused, sweet smile on her face! We started out the day at IHOP where Gwen had her first birthday breakfast complete with a kiddie size hot chocolate. After her nap we had planned on taking her to the toy store and then the dog park (dogs are her favorite thing in the world right now), but the little stinker slept way to long.

At 5:30 her party started and even though she was a bit overwhelmed with all the attention, she held up just fine. Here are a few pictures of her special day. I'll try to blog more about planning first birthdays (I let it get waaay to stressful in my head), but right now my toddler is kicking the wall meaning she is done with her morning nap!

Perspective

Early morning and you wake up peacefully. A spark in your heart, a light step, a sleepy smile. Your soul is already praising God for this brand new day-a gift to you and your loved ones. Suddenly you remember the day, the night before. The tears, the doubt, the uncertainty of the future. Just hours before when you could barely muster a smile for your precious daughter. When cooking and cleaning seemed like monumental tasks that you couldn't complete. There was crippling fear that everything you had grown used to and was secure in could be ripped from you within the day. You wonder why is there joy in me right now? Why is my heart so thankful and at peace? Why am I excited for today with no fear of what it may bring? Along with the remembered sorrow of yesterday, you also remember pouring your heart out before God. Tearfully begging Him for mercy and guidance. He reminds of you of His promises and reminds you of His faithfulness. He reminds you that in a situation so hopeless and so confusing He sees the whole picture and has a plan. That He will perfect His perfect will in you. Even though it didn't seem possible, sleep overtook and your precious Lord sent his angels to minister to your soul and you wake up with unmistakable peace from Him.

Maybe you finally get it. Get that this life is never going to fully satisfy your longings. Not circumstances, not friends, not a husband, not children, not a job, not financial security; that the life to come is where your hope lies. Thankfulness washes over you for this God-given perspective as your soul continues to rejoice in Him despite the trials in your life.

Hebrews 10:23 
Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful.

My Church

I'll never forget the day I heard these words:

"Why are they coming here? Don't they know this is a home school church? They aren't going to last long (and sadly they didn't)."

I was young. Barely in high school. I had no response to that statement at the moment, but it has never sat well with me. What church do I go too? There have been many labels placed on various churches over the years-mine being no exception. Labels that are put on by both the members and members of different churches, but honestly, mostly by members. Labels that I have heard with my own ears.

What church do I go to?

A home school church. Well, if you home school you are more than welcome, but that is not my church.

A church where women wear only dresses on Sunday. You are more than free to wear a dress, but that is not my church.

A church where our children can sit through the entire sermon without moving or playing in the nursery. Feel free to try, but please don't tell me that is what defines my/our church.

A church where youth group is not allowed and we only sing hymns because all other songs are unholy.  If you attend a youth group yourself I will never judge you for that. Hymns may be our song leaders first choice, but let's allow them the freedom to have that choice. If someone prefers a church band, wonderful. Let's worship our Lord together.

A church where girls are not allowed to work outside the home. There are some who believe that and they are God's children just like you and I. That belief does not define the church I attend.

A church where outsiders can't feel welcome because of the supposed overbearing conservatism. I pray this isn't my church.

A church where we believe no physical contact until marriage and talking to the opposite sex is frowned on. If this were my church, I would have been kicked out long ago.

Do you see the pride in some of these labels that we give our church? Which by the way, it is never our church. It's God's church.

This is the church I want to attend:

A church where Jesus Christ and his sacrifice on the cross alone is what defines us and not our labels.

A church where we are showing deference to one another and outdoing one another in brotherly love and acts of service.

A church that when people look at it and at us, they are drawn to Christ and nothing else.

A church that believes in true worship to our Creator.

A church that above all virtues pus on love which binds us together in perfect unity.

What church do you attend? 

Busted

Nothing like being approached by a police officer and told very sternly:

"We'll talk about this when I get home".

Now what can I bake him that will make him forget my little driving error? It's not illegal to bribe the police when you're related is it?